Have you ever felt like you are moving in a slow-motion? Or everything felt “wrong”? Felt crying for no apparent reason? Struggled in carrying normal conversations with friends or family?
If “no”, that’s great. If “yes”, then this article is for you. Read it till the end.
The symptoms I mentioned above are the symptoms of “A demon in your mind” i.e. Depression. We all heard of it at some point, right? But do we know how it feels to be depressed?
I will say depression is the most unpleasant feeling one can have. I know, I have been there once, it is the worst feeling I have ever experienced. It felt like doubting that things will ever be cheerful again. It felt like I’ll never have anything but failure, I’m not good enough for what I want in life and I’ll never get it no matter what I do.
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Let me acknowledge some more symptoms of Depression
You feel hopeless.
A lot of efforts you require to get up in the morning.
You find it difficult to express yourself.
You get offended easily.
You don’t know what’s happening around you, or in your life.
It’s like your smiling muscles are frozen.
You feel like you are unable to do anything.
It seems like you do not belong to this world, there is a glass wall between you and the world
You feel like nothing left to live for, you feel suicidal.
You feel like you’re drowning or suffocating.
Food tastes bland and uninteresting to you.
Music doesn’t seem to affect you.
You don’t bother smelling flowers anymore.
Your mind brings the memory of every failure, every bad or uncomfortable experience, interview or date uncontrollably.
One more thing to notice here is that depression is the only reason for people to take their own life. So, let us see, after all, what is it that forces people to kill themselves?
The main reason I can guess is
Loss or Fear of Loss
Loss or Fear of loss is one of the reasons that make people worried, anxious or ultimately depressed. The situations can be different for different people, like
Economic loss
Reputation loss
Being bullied, humiliated
Academic failure
Loss of a loved one ( break-up, divorce or death)
Termination from job
End of a close friendship (Isolation)
Loss of all the hopes
Though an outsider observer may feel it obvious that things will get better, people with depression are not able to see this due to the pessimism.
What should you do and never do when depression hits?
The very first thing, as I always say, know the feeling. Know what are you feeling, what are the possible reasons to feel so.
The second thing is to stop reading psychology articles like Thirty Things Successful People Never Do or What First 10 Things Must You Do After Waking Up In The Morning.
I mean really. Who does a bunch of things just after wake up? Okay, it sounds great but nobody has fun all the time. Writers of this kind are just creating illusions by thinking themselves a helper but they must understand that depression is different. It’s not a sad feeling that will pass in a day just by reading or doing something exciting or inspirational.
You also must understand this, as it’s the only way to heal faster and to live your life to its fullest glory.
Apart from all this, I have something more to talk on this to understand it better and that’s the thing you must know about depression is that it doesn’t care who or what you are, rich or poor, talented or disabled, it has nothing to do with your social status.
Recently, we all have witnessed a high profiled suicide case, Sushant Singh Rajput. We all know him, don’t we?
What it was he hadn’t, money, fame, friends, delicious food and a life of travel and adventure? He had everything that majority of people can’t even afford to have.
He killed himself anyway.
And, we will never know precisely what Sushant felt and thought at the very end.
I can’t imagine what happened to him but I can surely put some lessons from this incident. Let’s take it one by one.
1. Saying no is very liberating.
We create so much crap by saying yes to the things that we really don’t want to do. So its time to learn the difference when to say yes to the things and when to no.
2. Inner success is of utmost importance
A person having external success in terms of money and fame doesn’t mean he is happy. He can still be a beggar, a beggar of something else.
Have you ever heard the saying?...
“You go somewhere only to find out that’s not where you wanted to go at all. You wanted something so badly but it wasn’t what you expected.”
Maybe that’s what happened to Sushant? Maybe he didn’t want to be a famous celebrity anymore, maybe he just wanted to go home.
The problem is that people feel like there is no other path. They got stuck with thoughts. Thoughts of giving up their livelihood, thoughts of losing their closed ones, their money.... whatever it is.
3. Your only competition is with you
Comparing yourself with others brings nothing but stress. We don’t know anyone else’s life, it can be a mess or wonderful, you shouldn’t compare to it yours. Because you see their life as they want to show you and it’s a wonderful lesson that compare yourself to you and you alone.
4. Stop and do nothing
When you are in depression, the recurring thoughts of darkness come along on the surface that propels you to take some firm decisions. Key is not to listen to them. Don’t take any decision, don’t take any action. Don’t quit your job, don’t call your ex, don’t suicide, don’t book a trip.
Just do nothing but wait. Wait to clear the storm. Once the storm passes, listen. Then take action.
And then do what you Love
Exercise, create things, write, talk, walk, record, paint, travel, think, spend time with kids and animals, whatever those things are for you, do them.
Always remember
One bad day does not take away a lifetime of amazing.
He lived big. Nobody can take all those other days away from him.
Embrace life. Open yourself to the highest possibilities.
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talking helps so share no matter how complicated it may sound, and if you think they will not understand because they have not been on that road then learn the difference between empathy and sympathy......